WAR IS NOT THE ANSWER!

WAR IS NOT THE ANSWER! H[EAR] ON MUSIC by N. Arthur

A referendum took place in Southern Sudan from 9 January to 15 January 2011, on whether the region should remain a part of Sudan or become independent. SAY What!? investigative journalist, N. Arthur, was in Juba for the landmark event, and reports:

“Where did you get this picture?” the bartender asked. My regular evening walk, had led me to the Juba Grand Hotel. Tired from a day of hard-core investigative reporting, I plugged in my headphones, put on my walkman. Yes. Walkman. That’s how I roll. It was at this point that the bartender began to demand answers.

I looked up and found that he was brandishing the cassette case, jabbing a finger at the artwork on the cover.

“Oh, that is Punky Monkey,” I said, “She plays guitar in Murfy’s fLaW”

 

“No!” he insisted, “This is a soldier of fortune! I remember her from Malou. Sunday, Feb.25, 2001!”

My keen reporter instincts kicked in. I leaned forward, drink forgotten, “You mean she’s a child soldier?”

“Child!?” He spat out incredulously, “That’s no Child! She’s a Soldier of Fortune! A mercenary! She fought for the South, and then she fought for the North. And then she fought for the east, and then fought for the West! At the same time! Scumbug! It was the mission of everyone to find her, but she was too sneaky! Look!” He showed me a “WANTED” poster from early 2001.

I studied the poster and the album cover, “Wow, she hasn’t aged at all in all these years!” “That’s her trick,” the bartender explained, “She used her childlike appearance to sneak into and out of the Rebel Camp”

“Really?” I was amazed. "How old was she when this wanted poster was made?”

“Seventy six”

On 7 February 2011, the referendum commission published the final results, with 98.83% voting in favour of independence. While the ballots are going to be suspended in 10 of the 79 counties for exceeding 100% of the voter turnout, the number of votes are still well over the requirement of 60% turnout, and the majority vote for secession is not in question.

The predetermined date for the creation of an independent state is 9 July 2011. [Source]

Superpowers: Episode 06

Before you begin to compose your hate mail, I should categorically state that I'm sure the Ghanaian members of parliament are perfectly aware of the effects of the military regime on their current constitution review process.

I should also state that I didn't even know that Ghana was reviewing their constitution, let alone that it is affected by some military regime of which I knew nothing.

However, for some weird reason, Punky knows.

There we were, having the same conversation about Kenya's constitution review process and how the politicians were messing it up.

'Poli' in Latin means 'many' and 'tics' means 'bloodsucking creatures'.

So, I assumed that as usual we'd spend some minutes cursing at the politicians, make some vague reference to Dan Toro, and then steer the conversation towards whether Guns N' Roses' Chinese Democracy is a slammin' album or not.

But then suddenly, Punky is cross-referencing Kenya's situation with what's happening in Ghana vis-à-vis the constitutional politics in Iran. So, I awkwardly find myself in an intellectual discussion, when all I wanted was an excuse to babble noisily, and distract everyone until band practice time is over.

And it's not just history, she has this in-depth knowledge of all current events (from the surgery to be used on Rooney to the basslines in the Posies' songs). This is very confusing,. Her day job tends to take her to the more remote areas of the country, where the only human interaction is occassionally fighting off machete wielding land-owners. I doubt any of them are offering newspapers, so how does she keep up?

So beware... Punky knows.

Everything.